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Episode 14 – Battle Babes and Warrior Braids

      

      Driving around this morning, I saw something that reeked of such sweet irony that I had to commit it to this very blog! Riverview, Florida (which Blogger does not recognize as proper English, for some reason) is a small burg, a satellite of Tampa, and is known for its, well, river view. The Alafia River, to be exact. It’s pretty small and low key, full of simple 1960’s era houses set off of windy roads (that river makes city planning rather pesky) with plenty of fallow fields for cattle grazing and even a library for learned types. The kind of place where, after a hurricane, everyone gets in their trucks, surveying damage, helping those in need, and clearing roads of downed trees. I count myself among these fine people and live a very happy life shoulder to shoulder with the denizens of my home city.
      Being somewhat self contained and in Central Florida, you could imagine (and you’d be right on the money) that one of Riverview’s quaint charms would be it’s indigenous population of White Conservatives. We’re not talking Westborough level, here. Just folks that keep a tidy house and weren’t so happy when Clinton was in office. Anyways, given this backdrop, it’s easy to predict that our current Commander in Chief isn’t too wildly popular among this population, and you’d be right. 
      As I navigate the back roads of my town this morning, I see a small sign, stapled at least 20 or so feet upon a power pole. It’s black, emblazoned with bold white letters. “FIRE OBAMA”. That’s it. No riot act. No manifesto. No justification. Just “FIRE OBAMA”. 20 feet high. One small sign that, to my mind, is a perfectly apt analogy for our times.
      The action of posting that small sign must have been no easy task. It’s installation would have had to use at least a 20′ extension ladder and some serious intention. I’m not even getting political here (though my leftist, pinko leanings are probably clear in the show). So you make a sign (one sign), and drag a ladder out to a power pole that’s sort of remote, pull the ladder out of the ol’ truck, climb that ladder, and staple a sign that simply implores the people to “FIRE” the President.
      If the whole of that energy was used in any other way it could of been much more efficient. Maybe holding a sign somewhere where you can inform others of the beliefs you feel so adamant about. Perhaps spreading awareness of your cause through writing your ideas down in coherent form and putting it out there? Whichever way. Almost anything is better than posting a small sign in a remote area. 
      But isn’t it perfect, though? Isn’t this what we do everyday? The age of outrage; an era in which we will be remembered for leveling an almost absurd amount of venom at the most trite topics. On every news story online there are comments threads that illustrate this confounding absurdity. Is this the result of the smooth, confrontation-less 90’s ignited by the jarring fuse of 9/11? Or a sign that we, as a generation, have never had to face anything more serious than Rebecca Black’s ‘Friday’? Am I running a bit long on this tangent? I don’t know. Just sharing something. Let’s get outraged!!!
      Okay, moving onto the show, here is Episode 13, in the digital flesh! In this issue we cover Eastman and Laird’s Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles Vol. 1, #13 and Tales of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles Vol. 1, #3. These issues were pretty rough, so if you’re in a laughing mood, you’re in for a treat. We also manage to discuss Dr. Dre’s music and muscles, Master of the Universe (surprise, surprise), Ryan’s horrible bar band show, and rat tails.
      Things are clicking right along and I am proud to announce that next episode we will be covering Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles The Animated Series (1987), Season 1 in it’s entirety! After working our way through the years of build-up from obscurity to indie darlings, we have finally hit the beginning of their overnight fame. It’s a good episode as well, so stay tuned (iTuned?). And don’t forget about the ol’ email, iTunes, and Facebook page…
NEXT WEEK: Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: The Animated Series (1987), Season 1!!!!!!

 
 
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Episode 13 – Starring Skonk, Nobody, and the Outback Rapist!

      Salutations! I sit here on a Monday night drinking coffee, listening to Mansions (they rock), and posting a brand new episode of Turtle Soup— our 13th. It seems things are looking up in all directions: the show is really fun, comics are good (especially Batman), MegaCon is rapidly approaching, Dennis Rodman went to North Korea and paled around with Kim Jong Un…. wait, I can’t tell if that’s good or not.
      Anyhow, things are good and the episodes are flying like Donny’s bo staff, so let’s get to it! On this episode we cover Eastman and Laird’s Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles Vol.1, #12 (notable as being the first Laird only issue) and Tales of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles Vol.1, #2. We also discuss the Eastman and Laird split, child abduction (in regards to Fat Albert), reading Cerebus, the Outback rapist, and some listener emails that take the conversation to even stranger places.
      In closing, we are also adding a new feature to the blog and iTunes descriptions that may help everyone: What we’re covering on the next episode. We usually address this at the end of the episode, but we figure it should be more available, so here it is. We hope you enjoy the episode and be sure to join our Facebook Group and/or drop us an old fashioned email at turtlesoupshow@gmail.com 

Next Week: Eastman and Laird’s Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles Vol.1, #13 and Tales of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles Vol.1, #3!
      
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Episode 12 – Chet’s Special Export Beer

Well, after a bit of a hiatus in posting, we are back with all new episodes! On this, our 12th episode, review Eastman and Laird’s Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle, Vol. 1, #11 and, in the first new addition to the TMNT comics stable, Tales of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, Vol.1, #1. During the middle segment we get our grubby hands on the new TMNT Party Wagon edition of the original animated series, open it up, and rate and review the contents.

We also discuss our Black Friday comic purchases, Ryan’s awkward Turtle outing on Thanksgiving, and Eric’s kind nature. Be sure to check us out on iTunes and shoot us an email at turtlesoupshow@gmail.com.

Without further delay, here’s the show!

DOWNLOAD: Episode 12 – Chet’s Special Export Beer

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Episode 11 – Wugga, Wugga, Gaijin — It’s GO TIME!

      Happy Friday, folks! Here we are with another episode of Turtle Soup. This episode is special. Namely, it’s these two issues that really cut through. Eastman and Laird’s Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles Vol. 1, #10 and Leonardo Micro-Series #1 are epic. Literally nothing as extreme and heartrending has ever happened in the TMNT franchise this far. I’ll leave it at that. We also discuss the Daycare Din of Hell, the concept of “Handsome Women”, and Facebook boasting. Well, that was quick! Here’s the good stuff:

DOWNLOAD: Episode 11 – Wugga, Wugga, Gaijin — It’s GO TIME!

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Episode 10 – Live From My Deathbed in Japan

      Well, happiness abounds, ladies and gentlemen! Our iTunes problems have been resolved and you can now find all 11 episodes of Turtle Soup (including this one,of course) in fabulous fashion. This has been a long time coming, so thanks for keeping up with the show in this somewhat inconvenient form. We’ll still be posting all of the episodes and synopses here, so don’t worry.
      Okay, so we’re turning and burning with releasing yet another episode in quick succession. On this one we cover the Donatello Micro-Series and Eastman and Laird’s Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle Vol. 1, #9. In other discussion we report on our 2nd trip to Tampa Bay ComiCon, a strange run-in with witnessing Christians handing out batteries, Ryan’s Big Muff, and Eric’s awesome Grandma. Yep. Well, without further delay, here’s the stuff!

Episode 9 – “The Late Night Adventures of Lord Simultaneous (and the Digital Cosmic Quartz)”

For Episode 9 we review Eastman and Laird’s Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles Vol. 1, #8. Besides the issue, this one is notable for our in depth discussion of The Walking Dead’s (TV Series) Daryl and his alignment between racist and helpful buddy and our best Halloween costume stories.

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2 more!!! Episode 8 – “Set Beams on Heavy Stun” *and* Episode 9 – “The Late Night Adventures of Lord Simultaneous (and the Digital Cosmic Quartz)”!

      Well, in keeping with our continuing goal of releasing the episodes we have in the can, we bring you 2 more excellent installments of Turtle Soup. I’m still feeling the after effects of the holidays, so I don’t really have much in the clever banter department… Cup Madness!

      So, on Episode 8 we cover Eastman and Laird’s Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles Vol.1, #7. We also discuss the newly minted “CONabunga” TMNT convention and it’s horrible name, our visit to the Tampa Bay ComiCon, Ryan’s TMNT themed family Halloween plans, and the group dynamic aspects of Leo and Raph’s relationship. For some reason, we accidently tagged the beginning of the episode as “Episode 7”. Don’t know why this happened. It was probably 4am.

      For Episode 9 we review Eastman and Laird’s Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles Vol. 1, #8. Besides the issue, this one is notable for our in depth discussion of The Walking Dead’s (TV Series) Daryl and his alignment between racist and helpful buddy and our best Halloween costume stories.

      Parting on some house keeping news, we are much closer to fixing the iTunes problem. One day, kids… one day. Anyways, wanna listen to these cool new episodes? Here ya go.

Episode 8 – “Set Beams on Heavy Stun”

Episode 9 – “The Late Night Adventures of Lord Simultaneous (and the Digital Cosmic Quartz)”

Episode 7 – “The Swill of Champions.”

Episode 7, we delve into the Michelangelo Micro-Series as well as Eastman and Laird’s Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles Vol.1, #6. This a weird one. Just sayin’. The concept of “moon money” is introduced here. And now it belongs to the ages. And the snow… My God the snow.

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Holiday Bonus 2 Pack! Episode 6 – “Eureka! It Works!!!” *and* Episode 7 – “The Swill of Champions!”

      Joe.

      Martin.

      Rocks.

      And he’s available! For your art and logo commission work, of course. He has a girlfriend. And while she’s awesome, I don’t think she’s that into sharing. And do you blame her? I mean, LOOK AT THAT SOUP CAN!

      This week we introduce our new logo. If you saw the effortless ease with which Joe made it, you might be thinking (as I was at the time) “Damn… How’s he just whip those things up like that?! And he’s a Guinness World Record Holder in Gradius? Are my genetics just inferior or what?”. Besides creating our awesome logo, Joe will also be assisting us when we cover the TMNT role playing game and with the multitude of TMNT video game releases for the show. He takes commissions for a really fair price and his work is astounding, You can drop in and check out his other work or order a custom piece of art for yourself at joerocksart.com . Tell him Domestic Danny sent ‘ya!

      And it’s almost CRITMAS! So, given the real reason for the season (Crit), and in the spirit of giving (and maybe catching up to live episodes…), we are giving you, our fair listener, 2 whole new episodes of Turtle Soup! These are two of my favorites, personally, and it definitely feels like we’re getting on a roll. Kind of like when you settle in for a really long road trip. You spend the first few minutes getting all situated and then… you just sit there. Bad analogy.

      In Episode 6, we tackle Eastman and Laird’s Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles Vol.1,  #5 and the Fugitoid One-Shot. There is a generous helping of awesome and gross kid stories on my part in this one. Eric celebrates He-Man’s 30th birthday. And awesomeness ensues! Eureka!

      As for Episode 7, we delve into the Michelangelo Micro-Series as well as Eastman and Laird’s Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles Vol.1, #6. This a weird one. Just sayin’. The concept of “moon money” is introduced here. And now it belongs to the ages. And the snow… My God the snow.

      Wrapping up with some news, the Official Turtle Naming Contest is going strong and we are getting some great suggestions, some of which should be covered in some episodes coming up soon. Also, Eric and I are currently revising our TMNT Flow Chart (where we house the now monthly chronological history of the Turtles) and should be able to make that available soon to all of you who want keep pace with the show. There are lots of other cool things we are planning as well, so stay tuned!

Ryan

DOWNLOAD HERE:

Episode 6 – “Eureka! It Works!!!”

Episode 7 – “The Swill of Champions.”

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Episode 5 – “Domestic Danny and the Bag of Tricks”

      Here are again, fine folks. Another episode of Turtle Soup, another step toward… reading, watching, and playing everything TMNT related. On that note, did you guys know I have at least 2 live turtles in my pool? I do.

      See, when you buy a house from HUD or any other government run agency who take homes from people that owe Uncle Sam a good deal of money, you tend to find things in a bit of a state of… disrepair. Our house was pretty trashed, and while gutting a lot of the interior and making it sterile and livable, we haven’t gotten to the pool yet. It’s covered with a “cap” made of lumber, chicken wire, and black PVC. Through holes in the PVC you can see dark, murky green water. Damn gross. But fixable. When we get the money to do it…

    So one day I’m outside walking around and I peer deep into the opaque waters of my pool. Slowly, like in a dream, an image became apparent. It was a soft shelled snapper turtle at least two feet long. I was pretty freaked out, I must say. It was a couple days later that I noticed a second turtle, a small hardshell that wasn’t nearly as scary. Occasionally I’ll see them in there, swimming around, eating grass clippings, happy as hell. Maybe I’ll when we get that cap off we’ll capture the turtles in question and make them our mascots.

      This leads me to my point: I am offering you, the listeners of our fine show, the opportunity to name them. Yes, that’s right, YOU can name the future Turtle Soup mascots! Email us at turtlesoupshow@gmail.com with your suggestions. Let’s do this!

      Oh, you wanna hear about the actual episode we’re posting tonight? Okay. We cover Eastman and Laird’s Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles Vol. 1, Issue 4. This was a fun one to read and very interesting to cover, especially given the one and only appearance of the infamous Domestic Danny. Also included in the banter? Our penchant for acting like dogs when we were younger, Jason Biggs’ hilarious Tweet that sent Nickelodeon spinning, and dated football controversy.

      We are getting closer and closer to being “live”, as in the episode we record on Friday night being released over the weekend, but for now, we’re still bringing out the episodes with a good deal of delay. Tonight we’re dedicating ourselves to fixing the iTunes issue, which has plagued us much so far. Fun!

      Well, without further delay, here it is! Enjoy and don’t forget to write. We love your letters (especially W and K!).

DOWNLOAD HERE: Episode 5 – “Domestic Danny and the Bag of Tricks”